1. HAPPINESS IS WHERE WE WANT IT TO BE
That state of pleasure that envelops us in certain situations is happiness. Everyone wants to get it, to know what the secret is to reach it and live it as long as possible.
If we could, we humans would try to be happy all the time, but it is just a baseless, fantasy-based idealization. Happiness is not a concrete emotional state, it is a way of life.
There are people who have encountered many obstacles in their life and are still happy. Others, on the other hand, have always been privileged, have always had almost everything and, even so, say they are not happy.
It is obvious that it is not the situation, context or what we face that determines whether we are more or less happy people. Happiness does not come from success, from a partner, from a child or from a beach house.
Being happy depends on having a well-formed value system, focusing on the present moment, loving yourself unconditionally and knowing how to appreciate what you have.
2. HAPPINESS IS NOT FOUND, IT IS BUILT
Happiness should not be sought, because it does not exist anywhere where it is to be sought. It's not out there, as we are often led to believe.
If so, there would be two types of people: those who have a life to envy and who are happy and those who have nothing and are unhappy. However, in reality, this is not the case at all, and indeed, often the happiest people are those who have the least.
We don't like to generalize, but often the people who are used to living with less are also the ones who end up having fewer needs. Their attention, therefore, is focused on the small pleasures, rather than those harmful gratifications.
They value things much more and this causes them more pleasure than those who are unable to give as much value to what they have.
This is why psychological fullness is born within us. It is not about believing that we will be happy when we get what we think we need. If you are not happy with what you have, you will hardly be happy when you have what you want.
3. HOW CAN I BE A HAPPY PERSON?
The first thing to do to be happier is to stop looking for that happiness. When we impose on ourselves the idea that “we must be happy”, but we cannot, we become frustrated and frustration is not really a synonym for happiness.
Also, letting ourselves be obsessed with being happy fills us with anxiety and despair and ends up turning into a struggle.
We will never be happy if we demand it and if we press ourselves. Happiness is a state of mental fluidity, of acceptance, of living in the moment.
To be happy, put aside absolutist needs. In reality, we need very little to feel good: a little food (not too much, otherwise the pleasure will become hostility), a little water to quench our thirst, a roof under which to shelter, a little physical activity to avoid getting sick, having some goals that push us to get up in the morning (but without focusing on the result), sleeping, breathing and little more.
Anything that doesn't fit into these categories and that we think we need makes us more unhappy. This does not mean that we cannot find pleasure in these other things, but they must be simple wishes, not needs.
Thinking that we have to possess certain things, at all costs, makes us anxious. If we then get them, but we end up losing them since everything in this life is ephemeral, we go into depression.
On the other hand, to be happier, it is important to focus on the present. Nothing exists and nothing is real other than what we are experiencing right now with our five senses. The mindfulness technique can teach us a lot about this.
Change your scale of value. Don't focus too much on your job, finding a partner, money or success. When you are on the verge of death, you will certainly not remember all this.
What you will remember, however, will be the experiences lived with your friends, the moments spent with your family. The coffee you drank every afternoon while observing the sea or the sound of your dog's breath while reading a book.
Your priority should be love. Love for yourself, for life and for others. If you are able to love the simple, the human and the small details, then you will be happy.
Wish You Happy New Year.......Just Be Happy.
You must be logged in to post a comment.