What is a good bedtime routine for babies?

Most babies respond well to regular routines. This is because of their need for security - predictable patterns of care help babies to feel safe and secure. That way, their energy can go into growing and developing. Bedtime routines work within a daily routine, with both influencing each other.

Benefits of routines for parents

Some parents love routines and thrive on them; others are less keen.

Generally, a routine is beneficial because it helps by:

Getting more done – better time management
Managing better when there’s lots to do and other children need to be cared for as well
Working as a ‘checklist’ for getting through the important tasks
Supporting family and work commitments
Being a reminder that ultimately, parents are in charge, in control and make the decisions about how the household runs.

Benefits of routines for babies

Just like parents, some babies appear to do best with a routine; others are more laid back.

Routines are often helpful for babies because:

They help to build a sense of security
They allow for windows of time for emotional connection as well as feeding and settling
For babies who are likely to sleep through feeds and are not growing as they need to, a feeding routine can help to ensure they’re getting the nutrition they need.

Routine – what routine?

Because they’re so young, newborns can’t be expected to fit into strict routines. Their feeding and sleep patterns change constantly and it’s not until closer to three months that babies tend to show similar behaviors at around the same time each day.

In the early weeks after your baby’s birth, try to focus on the basics. Caring well for yourself, getting to know each other, and making sure their basic needs are met. Most parents find it’s not until around three months after they’re born that baby responds to a regular feeding and settling routine.

Decide on what works for you and your baby. According to the safe sleeping, guidelines, the safest place for babies to sleep is in their own safe cot in their parents' room for the first 6-12 months of life. Once your baby moves out of your room to sleep, their bedtime routine may need to change.

5 top tips to help with developing a bedtime routine

Follow your baby’s lead when it comes to developing a routine. Wait until they’re showing similar feeding and sleeping patterns each day. You will learn from each other.
Be flexible and don’t expect too much too soon. Remember, your (young) baby’s brain is still developing and they won’t be able to change their behavior as a result of how they’re cared for.
Think about your own emotions when you’re caring for your baby. It’s important to be calm, kind, and nurturing so your baby learns they are safe and loved.
Try to respond to your baby in the same ways when you’re feeding and settling them. They will pick up the cues that it’s sleep time. For example, place them into their sleeping bag each time they’re settling, turning off the lights in their room.
Understand that new developmental stages can impact on a baby’s routine. Rolling, teething separation anxiety are all common times when routines need to be adapted.

Example of a bedtime routine

Be adaptable to what your baby needs from you as they are settled to sleep. Their needs will change as they become older and more independent.

But no matter what their age, try to:

Make sure your baby is fed and not hungry. If they always need to be fed to sleep, try to separate feeding from settling times.
Change your baby’s nappy; make sure they’re dry and comfortable.
Dress your baby for the weather and avoid their risk of overheating. A sleeping bag is a good option.
Read a story and have a quiet wind-down routine before each settle. Cuddles and stories are a good way to re-connect and focus on what’s important.
Brush your baby’s teeth before they go to sleep for the night. The risk of decay is higher when saliva flow slows down overnight.
Turn off the light to their room. Babies are too young to be ‘scared of the dark, generally, this is a stage that starts in the toddler years.
Think about your own emotions and staying calm. Your baby will follow your lead as they relax enough to go off to sleep.
Gently tell your baby that it’s sleep time as you place them into their cot. Pat and soothe them until they’re calm. Aim to place your baby into their cot when they’re drowsy but still awake.
Avoid giving your baby too much attention and stimulation when they’re going off to sleep. Less really is more when it comes to sleep time.

Other bedtime routine tips

Ideally, a bedtime routine helps to support the baby to go off to sleep without always needing their parents' help. Babies who are always fed, nursed, cuddled, and rocked to sleep don’t have the opportunity to learn skills in self-settling.

Think about what your baby needs from you to go to sleep. Be consistent with every settling time, night and day. How you settle your baby to sleep for their daytime naps will also influence their night-time settling.

Speak with your partner about consistency when it comes to settling your baby. It’s easy for little people to become confused if they’re receiving different messages when it’s sleep time.