Parenting is the most precious and noble vocation above all. It is a full time calling without any sick offs, annual leaves, or holiday breaks. You become a parent once, but stay one until your death. However, it is the most interesting and rewarding vocation if done correctly.
From years of experience, I have learned that nothing weighs down a parent more than having a naughty or hard-headed child. We all wish to have disciplined children who will stand as examples to their generation. To achieve this objective, mentioned below are a few effective ways of disciplining our children with love.
1. Know the difference between punishment and discipline.
Often, we confuse the term ''punishment" with "discipline." However, there is a big difference between the two. The word "discipline" originates from a Latin word "discipline," which stands for "learning or "teaching." This should be our approach while modeling our children's behaviors.
When we discipline a child with the aim of punishing them and making them pay for their mistakes, it will not help them make the right decisions the next time. Nobody likes being ordered around, not even our children. Punishment often leads to power struggles. This is so, because then children will believe that bad behavior attracts your attention, so they will keep repeating it.
2. Fill the attention basket
Kids simply seek attention. If we don't keep their "attention basket" full of positive attention, they will do anything to attract your attention. They will push our negative buttons with negative conduct because for a child; negative attention is better than having no attention at all.
Giving them attention doesn't, however, mean being by their side 24*7, it simply means setting aside a few minutes every day to have a one-on-one chat with them. Make sure there is nothing distracting you during that time and try to do something that makes them happy. In return, you will reap great returns in the form of change in your kid's behavior.
Take ten minutes or so every day and spend them playing their favorite games, reading a book together, or just listening to them speak out their mind. Put your phone on silent mode and keep it aside. This will send a positive message to your kid, which will make them cooperative, and they are less likely to seek your attention through negative actions.
3. Take time for training
As we think of effective ways of disciplining our children, it is good to keep in mind that the word discipline has deep roots in the meaning of teaching and learning. The main aim of disciplining them is to help our kids make better choices. Role-play the behaviors with a calm voice'' for example: "I' d like some water to please," "I' d really like playing with that car when you are done'' and many more.
On the other hand, I have learned to appreciate every positive gesture, for example: "Thank you for sharing snacks with your friends that is very kind of you." this makes them look for opportunities of getting more of your appraisal.
4.Set rules and stick to them
Kids seem to thrive well where there are set rules, and they know their boundaries. However, I don't set thousands of rules for them; I focus on what is most important for them and for the family. I am very clear about the set rules and make sure that they understand the consequences of breaking the rules.
It is, however, important to ensure breaking rules should have consequences. For example: if they clatter around in their room, they will be expected to clean the room; if they don't do their homework, they will not be allowed to watch TV and so forth.
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